I have a lot of empathy for Tom Brady. While not in his ‘league’ on several fronts, I can fully appreciate his exasperation at the challenges of teaching children with wealth to understand “the real world”. Anyone facing these and similar challenges deserves to be taken seriously, and to get the support and empathy they need to deal with the issues.

There’s just one small catch.

People who don’t have or genuinely understand the experience of living with significant wealth (i.e. 99.9%+ of the population) are not only unlikely to be able to provide empathy and support, but may actually respond with the very opposite.

This is what happened to Brady when he stated in a podcast interview that bringing up his children amid great wealth was “probably the hardest thing for us as parents”.

There are two perspectives of living with wealth: outsider and insider. To outsiders, wealth is viewed as a panacea that will instantly solve all problems. The insider knows this is not the case. The only place insiders can get support and empathy is from other insiders.

The popularity of TV shows like Succession is that they show that wealthy families suffer from the same family dynamics challenges as others: jealousy, rivalry, favouritism. They are just played out with much higher stakes.

Family members need two things: insider networks to provide support, and an understanding of what can and cannot be shared with outsiders.

Consider This: How do members of your family deal with the assumptions and judgments of outsiders? What peer-networks do they rely on to provide support?

Further reading: https://www.newsweek.com/tom-brady-mocked-wealth-hardest-thing-parenting-1724887, https://www.irishnews.com/lifestyle/familyandparenting/2021/10/26/news/five-ways-to-be-a-parenting-boss—and-run-your-family-like-a-business-2482106/, https://www.moms.com/20-baby-boomer-parenting-tactics-that-millennial-moms-are-finally-ditching/, https://www.mamamia.com.au/worst-generation-of-parents/, https://vulcanpost.com/585663/millennial-parenting-discipline-mistakes/

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment
#entrepreneurship

The post Seeking Empathy appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/09/seek-empathy/

Wealthy people are a soft target at the best of times. The media revels in sensational stories about wealthy families, especially when things go wrong. And if that wasn’t enough, neo-socialists in the US preach redistribution and question whether the world should have billionaires.

The emerging “wealth minimisation” movement encourages inheritors to redistribute “excess wealth” for the betterment of society. In some cases, this is about making up for the “harm” done by the wealth creation in the first place, which plays to feelings of guilt. There is some overlap with those who advocate destruction of statues that are no longer politically correct.

What does all this mean to someone born into a wealthy family? Forming a positive identity about their wealth can be a huge challenge. The “acquirer’s and inheritors dilemmas” can lead to feelings of shame.

Families need to get ahead of this, and have open discussions about their family’s wealth to encourage positive feelings. Family philanthropy and impact investment can be framed as ways to serve the wider community, rather than being an act of penance.

Consider This: At what age did you start talking to your children about the family wealth? Do they have the tools to be comfortable with their wealth in dealings with with friends, colleagues and advisors? Are they able to discuss concerns within the family?

Further reading: https://www.yesmagazine.org/issue/how-much-is-enough/2021/08/10/rich-redistribute-money, https://www.kiplinger.com/personal-finance/603205/ok-boomer-vs-avocado-toast-how-to-talk-money-across-generations, https://www.rgj.com/story/news/money/business/2021/02/18/8-important-money-conversations-have-your-family-brian-loy/6793796002/, https://www.forbes.com/sites/rainerzitelmann/2019/12/16/the-six-most-overrated-factors-in-getting-rich/#59a7f68e7f75, https://www.kiplinger.com/article/retirement/T064-C032-S014-wealth-shame-when-wealth-changes-your-life.html, https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/02/your-money/parenting-wealth-discussions.html

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment
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The post Wealthy Guilt & Shame appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/wealthy-guilt/

Family business has positives and negatives – our aim should be leverage the positives and seek to mitigate the negatives. One important distinguishing feature of family businesses is that they can embody a sense of purpose.

The original purpose of the business founder may have been wealth creation. However, as the business evolves and additional family members join, it’s an opportunity for the family as a group to discuss and articulate their collective values and purpose, and then make them an essential part of the family business.

Purpose and profit are not mutually exclusive; purpose must drive profitability. It need not be political either. While early thinking was that purpose of the corporation is to “maximise shareholder value”, more recently this has broadened into thinking about “stakeholders” which includes employees and society at large.

This can be challenging for many corporations. But a business that is owned by a small group who are connected by familial ties are in a better position to both articulate their purpose, and take a long-term view in terms of how they manage and operate the business. That way, the business is just one piece of the family’s “social capital” that helps it achieve the broader family mission.

Consider This: To what extent is your family business “values driven”? Has your family discussed and considered your shared purpose? and how that translates into how you use the family capital (both operating and non-operating assets)?

Original articles: https://www.campdenfb.com/article/nine-principles-purpose-why-doing-good-good-family-business, https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/364853, https://www.forbes.com/sites/dennisjaffe/2021/02/24/from-shareholder-primacy-to-stakeholder-primacy-how-family-businesses-lead-the-way/?sh=c477f2321ede, https://www.rte.ie/brainstorm/2020/0623/1149060-family-business-ireland-coronavirus/, https://www.industryweek.com/leadership/article/21119925/does-your-family-business-have-what-it-takes-to-endure

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

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#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment
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The post Family Business Purpose appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/business-purpose/

It’s a most quoted statistic – “just 13% of family businesses survive the third generation” – and it has finally been challenged. It comes from a single study of US manufacturing companies in the 1980s, and for some reason it has stuck and become almost axiomatic.

But it is deeply flawed. Most importantly, it never compared family businesses to non-family businesses (family businesses on average do last longer), and it also never considered the reasons why those businesses did not continue. Besides, not all businesses are meant to last that long – among other things it’s a function of their industry and their ability to do regular strategic renewal (and for some family business, the latter is a huge challenge).

The other issue is the conflation of this trope with the well-known “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves” proverb. Enduring family business is not the same as enduring family wealth. Plenty of families have been able to parlay an operating business (which is usually how the wealth was created) into a healthy mix of diversified assets that can support the family for decades.

So forget blanket generalisations about family businesses and focus on their unique attributes that are a mix of strengths and weaknesses.

And view the proverb as a statement about the culture of wealth and how it affects those who created it, those born into it, and those well removed from its creation.

Consider This: How do attitudes to wealth in your family differ between generations? How long do you think your business (or any business) ought to last?

Further reading: https://hbr.org/2021/07/do-most-family-businesses-really-fail-by-the-third-generation, https://www.thinkadvisor.com/2021/05/25/what-wealth-really-means-to-4-different-generations/, https://www.forbes.com/sites/dennisjaffe/2021/04/28/how-family-business-leaders-make-room-for-new-generations-the-right-time-and-the-right-way/?sh=45833f283933, https://www.kiplinger.com/retirement/estate-planning/601798/how-to-help-your-family-wealth-last-for-generations, https://thriveglobal.com/stories/what-successful-family-businesses-do-to-survive-beyond-the-three-generation-curse/, 

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment
#entrepreneurship

The post The 3-Generation Trope appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/3-generation/

Research has shown that in HNW families, daughters were rarely encouraged nor received support to pursue entrepreneurship education. Entrepreneurial families often prepare their daughters and sons differently for their careers. Cultural factors and their associated gender biases may result in the problem being far more pronounced.

Things are changing. Some 82 per cent of women from wealthy families expect to inherit substantial wealth over the next 20 years, but 41 per cent of women are currently not involved in family financial decision making. They need to start preparing themselves. The role of women within wealthy families is also shifting, in part due to the rising generation having a less traditional outlook on life. Family businesses are able to play a critical role in helping break glass ceilings that perpetuate gender roles.

There are changes in the wind on the investment and advisor spaces too. Millennials and women value investment principles that have a positive impact on challenging issues. HNW women are often less confident about making family financial decisions, prompting the need for investment relationship dynamics to change. To remain competitive, advisors must consider a truly consultative approach; female advisors are well-suited for the job. Women – more of whom will control significant wealth over the next 10 years – prefer to work with female advisors.

Consider This: Does your family treat male & female children differently? Are they given the same choices & opportunities within the family enterprise? Are there cultural or historical gender biases in your family? Is this a source of intergenerational conflict?

Original articles: https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2021-06/uoo-gbi060721.php, https://www.greenqueen.com.hk/women-prefer-to-work-with-female-advisors-now-is-the-moment-for-esg-customisation/, https://www.forbesindia.com/article/bharatiya-vidya-bhavan039s-spjimr/addressing-the-novel-fault-lines-in-family-business/67115/1, https://www.jdsupra.com/legalnews/cracking-the-glass-ceiling-empowering-6627462/, https://www.campdenfb.com/article/how-raise-your-succession-game-next-gens-family-business, https://www.bnamericas.com/en/news/almost-25-of-family-businesses-have-a-female-presence-on-their-boards, https://www.wealthadviser.co/2020/12/15/293551/growing-financial-power-next-generation-wealthy-women-prompting-change-within

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment #entrepreneurship

The post The future female appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/female-future/

Research has shown that 60 per cent of failed intergenerational family wealth transition are due to problems with trust or communication. Communication isn’t important in families. It is everything. If a family cannot communicate, it cannot function as a group. It’s that simple.

What does poor communication look like? An absence or lack of communication (e.g. “it’s none of their business”, “they don’t need to know”, “we know what is best for them”) is patronising, infantilising, and leads to a loss of trust. There is often hesitance to discuss family wealth or estate planning with family members because of the conflict it might cause. But not discussing simply leaves the latent conflict to fester. Some cultures have a strong concept of strictly obeying the mature generation – this has the potential to create interpersonal and internal communication barriers. Negative, emotional, distracting and damaging interactions among family members can lead to the “Family Drama Vortex”.

What does good communication look like? Creating a space where family members can ask and answer difficult questions like “What is our wealth for?”, “What is our family’s purpose?”, “What is our true value?”.  To communicate effectively, we need to listen. This may sound like a platitude, but not everyone can do it, especially when talking to someone we think we know well, such as our children.

A history of poor communication in a family means you have to work extra hard to regain trust and learn now to communicate well. To address toxic situations like the Family Drama Vortex, we must recognize that the drama and dysfunction are rooted in underdeveloped communication and interpersonal skills.

Because communication is difficult, especially across generations and borders, it can help to have external guidance and facilitation. That is best coming from a specialist, and not necessarily the ‘default’ choice of lawyers and accountants.

Consider This: How would you rate your own family’s ability to communicate? Are there some issues that “we don’t discuss” or that are shut down whenever they are raised?

Further reading: https://sg.asiatatler.com/life/rise-and-fall-of-family-wealth-how-to-achieve-financial-longevity, https://www.coutts.com/insight-articles/news/2021/investments/speech-therapy–our-guide-to-talking-wealth-with-your-family.html, https://www.wealthadviser.co/2020/12/04/293097/asias-wealth-management-industry-needs-ready-itself-great-wealth-transfer, https://onwallstreet.financial-planning.com/opinion/how-to-keep-multigenerational-wealth-in-the-family, https://e.vnexpress.net/news/business/generation-gap-communication-a-concern-for-family-concerns-4106858.html, https://www.ft.com/content/825947e6-bf2d-11e9-9381-78bab8a70848, https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2019/04/26/is-your-family-business-in-turmoil-the-solution-could-be-communication/#792eb2e525ec, https://www.clevelandjewishnews.com/features/special_sections/legal_affairs/succession-planning-big-part-of-family-businesses/article_6cd9a79e-45b6-11e9-ab20-ff24b4e7b8fd.html, https://www.wealthmanagement.com/high-net-worth/hardest-part-planning-hnw-families-hnw-families, https://www.marketwatch.com/story/breaking-the-taboo-how-to-prepare-your-heirs-for-your-death-2019-03-07

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment

The post Why communication is important appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/why-communications/

Not every entrepreneurship story is “rags to riches”.

Many high-flying entrepreneurs came from from upper-middle-class families. While they don’t owe their success entirely to mom and dad, without their parents’ help, be it financial or otherwise, they may have never gotten their ventures off the ground. Research has shown that 75% of entrepreneurs from 48 countries said that their family was involved in starting their businesses.

Family money and background plays a critical role when it comes to starting up a business. In some cases, it can provide a financial safety net in the case of failure. As much as economically, the family environment that has a big impact on the startup entrepreneur.

Entrepreneurial behaviour is driven by families, not just family businesses. Families can act entrepreneurially together to create growth, and foster entrepreneurship and positive impact in society.

This doesn’t happen by default. While the entrepreneurial spirit of the founder may be passed along to their children, the spirit and drive may dissipate in subsequent generations. Passing on the creativity and innovation of the founding generation across new generations is a challenge of the highest order

In some families, the elders were able to build intergenerational bridges to their grandchildren by mentoring them as young entrepreneurs. The value created in doing that is far more than financial.

Consider This: Does your family ‘remember’ the entrepreneurship of the founder(s)? What do you do to foster the continuity of the entrepreneurial spirit? (e.g. share stories? invest in entrepreneurial risk asset class? mentor rising generation entrepreneurs?)

Original articles: https://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2021/04/22/im-turning-my-young-grandsons-into-entrepreneurs/?sh=37814eb51c0c, https://www.theguardian.com/business/2021/jan/31/small-business-entrepreneurs-success-parents, https://entrepreneurship.babson.edu/family-entrepreneurship-family-business/, https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/357381, https://www.forbes.com/sites/dennisjaffe/2020/05/05/preparing-for-deep-change-in-a-family-business/#7efb375a7942, https://www.fa-mag.com/news/russ-prince–the-downsides-of-being-a-rich-entrepreneur-55401.html

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment

The post Cultivating Entrepreneurship appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/cultivating-entrepreneurship/

Unless your family business is a “mom & pop corner store” (which is more akin to owning a job than owning a business anyway), you will need to have a mix of ‘blood’ and ‘non-blood’ people working in it.

As any business matures and grows, there becomes a need for professionalisation and systemisation. While owners may put a high value on the people in the business (especially family), the true value created in any business is through systems. A business that cannot function as well without family members is not worth very much to a potential buyer.

Family or non-family CEO? That is a huge question for many family businesses, especially as the founder generation seeks to retire. Even if there is a family member who is willing and able, is that what is best for the business itself?

For a non-family CEO to succeed in a family firm, they must understand the values of the family. The family also needs to be able to articulate those values to the CEO, and monitor their adherence in some way (which is by no means simple).

The challenge for any incoming CEO of a family business is to maintain and respect the ingrained culture, and at the same time drive the business forward. It is important to create an atmosphere of inclusion and purpose, and ensure people outside of the family are also seen and heard.

In larger business with many family members involved, possibly from multiple branches of the family and multiple generations, the kinship tensions are multiplied to a great degree.

When family differences get in the way, it doesn’t necessarily make you a bad employee, or a bad child, sibling, or cousin. It’s important for family members to retain their own identity and not become overly subsumed within the family enterprise and its mission.

Having people outside the family circle who can provide objective feedback – whether as advisors to the board or mentors to family employees – can be very helpful.

Consider This: Does your family business have policies around how family members qualify for a position and their performance measured? Do you have a board with externals and/or mentors available so family members can have a forum to discuss issues of concern?

Further reading: https://knowledge.insead.edu/family-business/why-family-ceos-outperform-their-non-family-predecessors-16601, https://www.institutionalinvestor.com/article/b1rnywtxhyr5kq/How-Family-Offices-Can-Strengthen-Next-Gen-Relationships, https://hub.jhu.edu/2021/04/27/dynamics-of-family-owned-businesses-phillip-phan/, https://www.smartbrief.com/original/2021/04/expanding-family-business-while-preserving-its-culture, https://www.forbes.com/sites/chriswestfall/2021/03/29/leaving-the-family-business-how-to-know-when-its-time-to-go/?sh=569aa4571e7e, https://www.thomasnet.com/insights/how-to-prepare-to-lead-your-multi-generational-family-business/, https://www.campdenfb.com/article/transfer-family-business-power-next-generation-effectively, https://www.dailyherald.com/business/20200716/6-tips-for-running-a-successful-family-business

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment

The post Family Business – blood non-blood appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/non-blood-family-in-business/

A while back this viral meme swept the internet. “OK, Boomer” is/was the response of younger people to complaints by older people about their behaviour and attitudes.

Readers of this newsletter may know my attitude to the whole “generation wars” narrative – it’s a load of crap and we shouldn’t get caught up in it. Older people have been complaining about younger people for as long as there have been multiple generations on this earth, and research points to the reasons why we do this (see link below).

However, there is one thing commentators haven’t picked up about the “OK, Boomer” phenomenon. The problem with memes is that they are short, simplistic, and importantly they are conversation stoppers. When we throw up a meme, it’s like saying “I agree/disagree, here is my curt response, and there is nothing more to say on the matter”.

When it comes to intergenerational conflict, that is the worst way to respond, because what we ought to be doing is building bridges and enabling better communication and understanding between groups of people who look at the world (and express their opinions) in very different ways. This can’t be achieved with meme wars and throw away lines. The issues are complex and nuanced, and require bilateral efforts – yes, both generations need to work toward communicating better and understanding each other. It’s not easy, it won’t happen overnight, but with effort, it can happen.

Consider This: (Directed at older family members) Do you know what a meme is? Do you know why younger people like to communicate using memes, emojis, and social media? (Directed at younger family members) Can you imagine a time before the internet and social media? What do you think your parents and grandparents were like when they were your age? How do you think they related to their parents back then?

Original articles: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/nov/05/millennials-baby-boomers-gen-z-lets-stop-with-these-nonsense-buzzwords, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-science-behind-behavior/201911/3-psychological-drawbacks-the-popularity-ok-boomer, https://www.vox.com/podcasts/2019/11/22/20978050/ok-boomer-tik-tok-meme-generational-divide-podcast, https://www.mediavillage.com/article/ok-boomer-and-the-lure-of-demographic-warfare/, https://www.vox.com/2019/11/19/20963757/what-is-ok-boomer-meme-about-meaning-gen-z-millennials,https://www.al.com/life/2019/11/what-ok-boomer-says-about-the-generational-divide.html, https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2019/11/12/20950235/ok-boomer-kids-these-days-psychology

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment

The post The Problem with Boomers appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/08/problem-with-boomers/

Q: If the world’s two richest men cannot keep their wives happy, what hope do we have?

A: No, that’s not a real question – it’s a meme that circulated following the news of the divorce of Bill & Melinda Gates. Many people with wealth realise that money can’t make a wife (or anyone) happy, but that doesn’t stop them trying.

In business, sometimes we decide to “throwing money at a problem”. That means directing significant resources (financial and otherwise) towards solving the problem.

In families, throwing money at a problem is taken more literally – directing liquidity to placate unhappy family members. The assumption is that it will “smooth things over”, but because it uses money as a proxy for the underlying problem, it doesn’t address the underlying problem.

The best this response can hope to achieve is to kick the problem down the road, i.e. defer dealing with it or pretend it doesn’t exist. However, consider that (a) the problem is not solved, and (b) in the meantime, the underlying family issues can continue to fester and can actually become worse.

Consider This: Have you “thrown money” at a difficult family situation? Why? What did you expect to happen as a result? What actually happened?

Actionable Generational Wealth Succession 

For more in-depth, thought-provoking discussion points and further commentary on family and business conflict resolution, access my Familosophy newsletter archives by signing into our newsletter https://DavidWerdiger.com. We will send you the archive links from there.

#familyoffice #wealthmanagement #conflictresolution #strategicmanagement 
#nextgensuccession #intergenerationalwealth #governance #leadershipdevelopment

The post Wealth and Happiness appeared first on David Werdiger.

source https://davidwerdiger.com/2022/07/wealth-and-happiness/